Sheesh, and one month later...

Busy, yes. But I'm finding I have plenty of time right now, because I'm laid up with a sprained ankle. Yeah. This last weekend was divisional championships and the three weapon tournament. First day, epee. I finished seventh and earned my E! Finally! So did my teammate ("The Wall") Jordan. It was a pretty exciting bout, especially since I had to beat my nemesis in order to letter. Second day, sabre and foil. Granted, I haven't done any sabre since January and I've never really done foil...so it was all just for fun. Sabre went okay. Had I been practicing more, I think I could have done better, but finishing seventh wasn't too shabby. They actually told me I had earned my E in sabre, but upon further research, they recanted. The event was missing another E rated fencer to make it a C1. So it was only a D1. *sigh* Oh well, I wasn't really trying to letter in sabre, but they did get my hopes up...a little... So sabre ended and foil was the last event of the day. It was interesting...I was really bad, but that's okay. However, during my last pool bout, I was retreating and my back ankle (left) rolled. I fell completely back and now have a very sprained ankle. I had to withdraw from the event (since it was foil I didn't really care, had it been epee, I would have fought tooth and nail to stay in) and got taped up and started icing. So my training will be slight modified for the next couple of weeks, but I should be fine for Nationals.

Speaking of Nationals, I'm also going to be doing the women's epee team event. Jo, Jordan, and I were all going to be there the day of the event, so we thought we might as well do it for the experience. Jo's going to be the captain since she has the most experience at national tournaments, and I think they want me to be the anchor. I'm not sure what I think about it, but I guess I'm up to the challenge. The anchor is responsible for being able to defend if we're in the lead and to create touches if we're behind. Basically, they go last in the rotation to ensure success. No pressure or anything...

Alright, I've got to go ice and elevate my ankle. Will try and write more before another month goes by...!

Pardon my negligence...

Life's been crazy. Hence the lack of posting.

Where shall I start? I just finished week three of my class and I think they're doing great! Last week I wasn't able to be there because of work, but they seem to be progressing quite well. I think this next week I'll start them on the parries.

The next test...Spirit...it's going to be a doozy. Balestra, duck, bouncing, inquartata...*sigh* not unattainable, but it's going to be tough to have it all down by the end of the month. Oh yeah, and I have to write a paper (alright, here, for the first time, I will say it: Kevin's mean.) The footwork, the blade work, all doable. But a paper?! Blegh...

Let's see, tournaments... Had the unrated tournament last weekend...yeah, didn't do so well myself, but I'm very proud of all my teammates! Everyone won at least one bout and two of our new fencers medaled! Next tournament is the Rain City Open in two weeks.

Have to get going to open fencing, will write more later...

Busy busy...

I have much to write, but not enough time right now. Actually, right now I should be sleeping since I am to be at work tonight. I'll nap in a little bit...

Two weekends ago was the divisional qualifiers for Summer Nationals. I wasn't expecting much, just another tournament, really. But I placed third and qualified for div. 2 and div. 3 events. And I can't very well not go since I qualified and all that...so it looks like I'll be making a trek to Dallas in July (I'm sweating just thinking about it...). I'll post more information concerning the qualifier later...

Testing. Passed the second "level" (Mind) and should be working towards the third. Only...I don't know what's on the third, yet... Got some good feedback from the coaches after testing, but nothing I didn't know or hadn't already been working on (I guess I come across stern and bossy while leading footwork drills...who, me? Noooo....).

The 1-2 and double (pronounced doo-blay). My current bane of existence. Well, that and parries. But I'll get to parries later... My fingers don't move fast enough. Two actions with the hand/fingers while executing one action with the feet. Seems simple enough; extend, lunge, two disengages, hit. Just basically avoiding my opponents blade. I've drilled it over and over with my coach, lesson after lesson. I don't feel like I'm getting anywhere. It helps if I do a hang lunge instead of a regular lunge, but my hang lunges need work too. Fingers only, small movement, up down, up down, hit. *sigh*

Alright, I've got to nap...post more later...

Mediocre...

...is defined as " of moderate or low quality, value, ability, or performance."

So perhaps my feeling mediocre is inaccurate based off that definition. What I most likely am is inconsistent. I have ups and downs without having any answer as to what causes the "up" or what causes the "down." Which, of course, is somewhat normal in the beginning...but I feel that I should be seeing some progress in that area.

I feel a constant frustration towards my performance, whether it's just during a lesson or during a tournament. Fencing doesn't come easy for me. I'm not athletic, strong, or even remotely "in shape." There are moments when I wonder if I have reached the highest level I ever will. I know certain people wonder why I spend so much time and money on this when it's not something at which I'm very good. My past M.O. has been to cut and run whenever I fail to succeed at something right away, to move on and find something "easy." What may appear to be success to some people, is usually me just getting by. Because of that, I have created this persona of someone who has it all together, who accepts nothing but perfection from herself and therefore projects her unreasonably high standard for herself onto others. Fencing is more than a hobby, sport, or workout for me. It's my way of changing who I've been; it's a challenge to myself. I'm not going to walk away from this because I'm not perfect the first, second, or even third time around. This isn't just about fighting to become a good fencer, it's a fight to change my perceptions about what defines the kind of person I am.

Must Remember...

...when lunging, ARM FIRST! Gah! Of course I know this...but do I do it? Sporadically. A very subtle change in movement, but makes a big difference. So to myself I say, "Arm first, just let the disengage happen."

It's Official...

...I guess I'm teaching the adult beginner class starting next session...! Maybe I'm ready, maybe I'm not... The powers that be seem to think I can handle it, so I guess I'll defer to them. Should be interesting. I have a month to prepare, so I'm going into an organizing frenzy; lesson plans, outlines, diagrams, etc. How does one teach the en garde position? I just...do it... This is going to take a lot of thought. I pity this first class. But at least I don't start teaching until next month, when my furlough days change. I will be teaching Thursdays and my weekend starts Thursday, so I won't have to worry about dashing off to work after class!

So simple...and yet so miserably difficult!!

Last nights lesson consisted of lunges...a lot of them. Easy enough, right? A very simple action: Lunge and if parried, disengage around it. GAHHH! I think I did it right...maybe...twice...and I think I'm being pretty generous with that. Argh. And this action should be second nature to me. *sigh*